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Old 06-21-2004, 23:00   #1 (permalink)
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3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

OK, good people of FordForums. It's been a while since our last product however the 3FB R&D team have been busily beavering away in the bunker and here is the latest offering.

The SecureDark™ is based on similar technology found in the much acclaimed Dark Horse Speed Control Unit™ model 3FB/DH-SCU-M and as such falls into the Dark Horse range of quality products. Click here for the launch of the aforementioned 3FB/DH-SCU-M unit.

The SecureDark™ is the latest in car security and protection. What it does is interface to the existing alarm and/or immobiliser and if the intruder does actually manage to get into the car and start it, it will only have a top speed of 5 km/h, however the tachometer and speedometer display speeds that imply the vehicle is travelling much faster than it is (by monitoring the position of the accelerator pedal), giving the intruder a false sense of speed and security.

This should allow for one of two things to happen:
  • The owner of the vehicle can catch up with the intruder and beat the crap out of them
  • The intruder will quickly get frustrated by the lack of speed and abandon the vehicle

We envisage this product to be even more popular than the Dark Horse Speed Control Unit™ given that so many people are concerned with car security (not too difficult since the 3FB/DH-SCU-M had an extremely limited target audience).

With so many car security products available on the market today, we are committed to bringing our customers the latest technology and the highest quality. Accept no imitations and ask only for products carrying the Dark Approved logo seen below.



Other exciting products from the 3FB bunker include the 3Toed & JR Driver's Seat Exhaust Fan™ with the Optional Purification System™ and the AusXH and Mr Sparkle Night-Time 'Writing With Light' Self Paced Courseware™. That last one is a must read.

Watch this space for more 3FB products!
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Old 06-22-2004, 06:00   #2 (permalink)
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Re: 3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3Toed
... and the AusXH and Mr Sparkle Night-Time 'Writing With Light' Self Paced Courseware™. That last one is a must read.
Here is a sample of what one can produce upon completion of said course.
NOTE: Results may vary, sample is result of 0.001 minutes of research and development.
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File Type: jpg 3fbntwl009.jpg (83.9 KB, 38 views)
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Old 06-22-2004, 08:19   #3 (permalink)
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Re: 3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

not even gonna ask how you done that!!
is this SecureDark thing for real or not? sounds like a good laugh if you caught someone driving off with your car!! would this fit to any car or just BAs or something?
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Old 06-22-2004, 16:16   #4 (permalink)
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Re: 3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

Another Slothy classic, but mate you have way too much time on your hands.

Darky just make sure you know how to turn this thing off otherwise it will be even more like Driving Miss Daisy.
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Old 06-23-2004, 07:31   #5 (permalink)
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Re: 3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

You have way to much time on your hands Mr Sloth.
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Old 06-23-2004, 09:11   #6 (permalink)
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Re: 3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

Quote:
Originally Posted by davway
not even gonna ask how you done that!!
is this SecureDark thing for real or not? sounds like a good laugh if you caught someone driving off with your car!! would this fit to any car or just BAs or something?
It was originally tested on my mule and is easily adapted to any Falcon.

Yes and why aren't we working on the DarkArriveOnTime function of the speed control unit fellas?
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Old 06-23-2004, 17:15   #7 (permalink)
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Re: 3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

I hope this fantastic new Dark product is not used this Sunday !!!!!
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Old 06-23-2004, 18:05   #8 (permalink)
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Re: 3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dark_Horse
Yes and why aren't we working on the DarkArriveOnTime function of the speed control unit fellas?
Even today, there are some things beyond modern science...

Lets us cure cancer, AIDS & the common cold first, then we'll have a shot at something truly hard like getting you to arrive on time!
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Old 06-23-2004, 20:59   #9 (permalink)
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Re: 3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

Quote:
Originally Posted by JR
Even today, there are some things beyond modern science...

Lets us cure cancer, AIDS & the common cold first, then we'll have a shot at something truly hard like getting you to arrive on time!

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Old 06-23-2004, 22:03   #10 (permalink)
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Re: 3FB Product Launch: SecureDark™

Roflmfao
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