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Old 03-12-2004, 03:21   #1 (permalink)
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biggrin Bit of a laugh.

Found this on another Forum.


EMBARGO-11.30am 12/03/04.
OFFICIAL PRESS RELEASE.

One of V8 Supercars most well known and self proclaimed legends, Dick Scrout, today announced the formation of one of the most satisfying V8 Teams ever. To be known as TART Racing(Toyato Australia Racing Team) will see Japan's newest manufacturer 1st foray into Aussie V8's.

Dick, who was joined by Toyato CEO Nippon Slippon, anounced the new Team at a glittering reception held at the Long Dong Silver establishment for gentlemen.
"I'm here today to announce not only the errection of this very formidable Team but also to welcome our two new drivers and sponsors".
TART Marketing Manager, Bambi Full, took to centre stage with Russell Ingall and Rick Kelly.
"I'm so excited to have both Russell and Rick driving for us" said Bambi, "and to be working under the lengendry Dick is a dream come true.
"After seeing Russell and Rick racing against each other at the GP last week and knowing the close friendship they have with each other, I made it my sole mission to sign both drivers this week. It was hard, but in the end neither driver could resist what I was offering" said Bambi.

Two major sponsors were announced, being Hardon Condoms and Y-K Jelly. "The synergy between these two fantastic Companies was to good to be true and I can assure all of our supporters that I personally use a lot of these Companies products" said Bambi.

Dick said that he and Bambi have been working around the clock to put this deal to bed. TART have secured an old Brothel for the teams HQ and will renovate some of the old rooms for supporters and sponsors to stay over.
The two Toyato Camerars have arrived from Japan where they were factory built to TEGA requirements.

TC was also at the launch and was impressed by the surroundings. "This is f----- great news for V8 Supercars which is now the most viewd sport in the entire universe. Having Toyato on board is f------ good news. A third manufacturer is needed now that we will be runing events on the Moon next year and hopefully Mars or Youranus in 2006. Anyone who says we don't need another brand is a f----- idiot. ******s out there don't know what their talking about. We are in the f---- entertainment business and having Rusty in a new Camerar punting every pr--- off the race track will be f----- brilliant" said TC.

With the announcement over, Condoms blown up like balloons started falling on the gathered crowd as 12 scantilly dressed prostitutes entered the room to thunderous applause. The party is expected to carry on into the wee small hours.

FACT SHEET:
Name: TART RACING
SPONSORS: Hardon Condoms and Y-K Jelly
DRIVERS: #69 Russell Ingall
#96 Rick Kelly
Manufacturer: Toyato
CAR: Camerar V8 4 door
Owner/Manager: Dick Scrout
Marketing: Bambi Full
Contact: bambi@tart.com.au
www.tart.com.au
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Last edited by Rulekeeper; 03-12-2004 at 03:24.
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Old 03-12-2004, 03:59   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Bit of a laugh.

This should be in the Asylum.
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Old 03-12-2004, 18:07   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Bit of a laugh.

moved from pits forum..
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Old 03-12-2004, 19:03   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Bit of a laugh.

actually i reckon a third manufacturer would do the sport good....that is if another manufacturer builds a worthy V8.
yes i know its a mock up.
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