any one in bris or been out in bris will like this and relate to it
>After reading this I will see you all at Fridays....
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>If you want to see girls in skimpy, bright clothes and listen to music that goes doof, doof, doof all night, go to Family or The Empire.
>If you want to wear your suit with pride and drink cocktails with all the other 'wanna-be's, who never 'will be', go to The Press Club, or The Hamilton Hotel.
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>If you want to get laid, go to Fridays, The Victory or Adrenaline.
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>If you want to get kissed on the cheek by a drunken old German man, go to Dooleys, Gilhooleys or PJ Obriens (see a trend??)
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>If you want to get kissed or felted up by a Pissed Public Servant go to Irish Murphy's or SomePlace Else at the Sheraton on a Friday arvo
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>If you want to hang out with frightening looking goths who are really quite nice to talk to, go to the Shamrock Hotel.
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>If you wanna pick up within the first 10 minutes of arriving, you can always try the vast array of aussie chicks who can't dance to save themselves at either City Rowers or Alice's ... or for those living further south, there's always Beenleigh Tavern or anywhere in Logan. All you have to do is call out "Donna!!" or "Cheryl!!" and you'll be right mate.
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>If you want to wear black dress pants, tight colouted shirts with six of your mates in the same gear and drink imported beers, go to The Rat and Parrot or the GPO.
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>If you want to see the absolute scum of the earth - go to the Auroras.
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>If you drive a WB Ute complete with bull bar, 2 meter UHF aerial, 'shoot ferals' & 'get real get wool' stickers, wear RM's, moleskins & chambray shirts but have never travelled further west than Edgecliff and claim your family was originally "from the land", go to the Breakfast Creek Hotel.
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>If you'd like to see girls in white pants with dirty knee's... go to The Beat ... eewww! One of the few places where girls use the pickup Line "hi, I'm 16" (and it works!)
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>If you want to cheap feed that doesn't taste like crap, go to The Norman Hotel for steaks. You can dead-set afford to eat out now every night.
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>If you wanna pose with your oiled up pecks and shiny tight shirts, or go clubbing in stiletto heels - step this way for anywhere in the Valley .
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>If you don't want to have to shave that mono-brow, think peroxide spikes are sexy, or otherwise have no idea... we have any number of inner city pubs-gone-clubs. You know the ones, two coloured lights a disco ball, some drunken office workers on the dance-floor pissed as.... The Brittania, CBD or the Criterion is the one for you.
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>If you don't know f*#k-all about music, or have atrocious taste, but like the idea of kids on drugs, you might be tempted by one of Brisbane's fabulous raves! The Arena.
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>If you miss your old barn dances go for the TAV, (Ferny Grove tavern to the uninitiated) it really has to be seen to be believed though doesn't it?
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>If you still wanna something different, try going to Hotel LA ... the place where that "I'm a Barbie Girl" song by Aqua is classified as "techno".
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>Last but not least if your a desperado and keen as and it's getting late - just go to Mary Street!
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