A man decides that he wants a pet, but not just
any pet, a really
unusual pet. He walks into the pet store and goes
up to the service
assistant.
'Excuse me, I want a pet, but not just any pet, a
really unusual pet.'
The service assistant says 'I have just the thing
for you, it's a
talking centipede.'
'Cool!' the man exclaims, 'I'll take it!'
The man takes the centipede home in his little
box and places him on the
kitchen table.
He looks into the box and says, 'Hey centipede,
what about you and me
going to the pub for a beer?'
The centipede doesn't answer, so the guy thinks,
'I'll just go off for
five minutes and come back and ask again.'
Five minutes pass and the guy returns to the
centipede, 'Hey
centipede,how about you and me go to the pub for
a beer?'
Again, the centipede doesn't answer him.
'Hmmmmm' the guy thinks to himself, 'I'll just go
off and watch this TV
show, come back and ask him again'.
Half an hour passes and the guy returns to the
centipede. 'I'll just ask
him one more time,' he tells himself.
'Hey centipede, how about you and me go to the
pub for a beer?'
The centipede looks up at the man and says, 'For
fúck sake man I heard
you the first time, I'm putting my shoes on!'