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Old 08-16-2004, 15:36   #1 (permalink)
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Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

A blonde decides to learn and try horse back riding assisted without any experience or lessons.

She mounts the horse with great effort, and the tall, shiny horse springs into motion.

It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.

Out of shear terror, she grabs for the horse's mane but cannot seem to get a firm grip.

She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but slides down the side of the horse anyway.

The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider.

Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.

Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup.

She is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again.

As her head is battered against the ground, she is moments away from unconsciousness or even death when Todd, the K-Mart Manager, runs out to turn the horse off.
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Old 08-16-2004, 15:39   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

LMFAO
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Old 08-16-2004, 15:56   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

So how much HORSE power did it have???
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Old 08-16-2004, 21:17   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

hahaha what a dead shit
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Old 08-16-2004, 21:20   #5 (permalink)
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Re: Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

Hahaha nice!
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Old 08-16-2004, 21:28   #6 (permalink)
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Re: Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

Quote:
Originally Posted by Casper
So how much HORSE power did it have???
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Old 08-16-2004, 21:29   #7 (permalink)
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Re: Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

hehehe
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Old 08-16-2004, 23:02   #8 (permalink)
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Re: Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

DEAD BMW

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells
the mechanic it died.
After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling
smoothly.
She says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks
her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your
act together.
Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you
expect me to show it to you!"


-----------------------------------------------------------------------

EXPOSURE

A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse
open and her right breast hanging out.
A policeman approaches her and says, "Ma'am, are you
aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"
She says, "Why officer?"
"Because your breast is hanging out," he says.
She looks down and says, "OH MY GOD,
I left the baby on the bus again!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

RIVER WALK

There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a
river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
"Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down the
river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

KNITTING

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on
the freeway.
Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the
blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing
lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his
window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled,
"PULL OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on
the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook
their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said
the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know.
We're going at night!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was
her turn. She rolledthe dice and she landed on Science &
Nature.
Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone
calls your name, can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

FINAL EXAM

The blonde reported for her university final
examination that consists of yes/no type questions.
She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at
the question paper for five minutes and then,
in a fit of inspiration, takes out her purse,
removes a coin and starts tossing the coin, marking
the answers after each toss.
Within half an hour she is all done, whereas the rest
of the class is still sweating it out.
During the last few minutes she is seen desperately
throwing the coin, muttering and sweating.
The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what
is going on.
"I finished the exam in half an hour, but now I'm
rechecking my answers."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had
acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that one was named
Rolex and one was named Timex.
Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs
like that?"
"Hell-OOOOOO," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!"
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Old 08-16-2004, 23:37   #9 (permalink)
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Re: Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

lol nice
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Old 08-17-2004, 00:32   #10 (permalink)
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Re: Daily Blonde Joke 17/8/04

Quote:
Originally Posted by big_pete
BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on
the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook
their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said
the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know.
We're going at night!"
Classic!
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