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Old 10-21-2004, 19:34   #1 (permalink)
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Drive-thru ATMs

ANZ is very pleased to announce that we are installing new Drive-thru ATMs where customers will be able withdraw cash without leaving their vehicle. (Other accounts can also utilise this facility) Male and Female procedures have been tailored to best reflect the behaviors of those particular groupings.

PROCEDURE FOR MALE CUSTOMERS:

1. Drive up to the ATM

2. Open the car window

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN

4. Enter amount of cash required and press "enter"

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt

6. Close window

7. Drive away

PROCEDURE FOR FEMALE CUSTOMERS:

1. Drive up to the ATM

2. Reverse back the required distance to align car with ATM

3. Re-start stalled engine

4. Open the car window

5. Find handbag, empty all contents onto the passenger seat and locate card

6. Turn radio down

7. Attempt to insert card into ATM

8. Open car door to allow easier access to ATM due to excessive distance between car and ATM

9 Insert card

10. Re-insert card the right way up

11. Ignore the sound of car horn from vehicle behind

12. Search contents of handbag (on passenger seat) to locate diary with PIN written on the inside back page under "Date of Birth"

13. Enter PIN

14. Press "cancel" and re-enter PIN

15. Enter amount of cash required and check make-up in rearview mirror

16. Drum fingertips on steering wheel for one minute, then look at ATM and press "enter"

17. Retrieve cash and receipt

18. Search contents of handbag (on passenger seat) to locate purse and place cash inside

19. Place receipt in back of cheque book

20. Re-check make-up

21. Drive forward two metres

22. Reverse back to ATM ignoring the sound of car horn from vehicle behind

23. Retrieve card

24. Search contents of handbag (on passenger seat) to locate card holder and place card in an empty slot

25. Drive two or three kilometres

26. Release hand brake
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Old 10-21-2004, 19:38   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Drive-thru ATMs

Oh that is so unkind
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Old 10-21-2004, 19:46   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Drive-thru ATMs

25. Drive two or three kilometres

26. Release hand brake


Bwahahahahahaha That almost made me spit coffee all over the office!
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Old 10-21-2004, 19:46   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Drive-thru ATMs

best joke ive heard in awhile

Quote:
26. Release hand brake
brilliant!
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Old 10-21-2004, 20:07   #5 (permalink)
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Re: Drive-thru ATMs

Oh I'm DEFINATELY forwarding that to a Cordia driving friend of mine!

And one who drives an XW
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Old 10-21-2004, 20:10   #6 (permalink)
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Re: Drive-thru ATMs

Gold, definately gold!
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Old 10-21-2004, 20:36   #7 (permalink)
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Re: Drive-thru ATMs



Best. Joke. This year!
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Old 10-21-2004, 20:56   #8 (permalink)
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Re: Drive-thru ATMs

Forwarded to my gf @ work.
Oh, she will love this
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Old 10-21-2004, 21:19   #9 (permalink)
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Re: Drive-thru ATMs

LOL! Nice one...

And here I was thinking it took a bank this long to create a drive-thru ATM!
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Old 10-21-2004, 22:36   #10 (permalink)
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Re: Drive-thru ATMs

Mate that one really caught me off gaurd. LOL
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