How to be a top Nascar Driver - Ford Forums - Mustang Forum, Ford Trucks, Ford Focus and Ford Cars
The Pub For General Discussion

LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 2 (permalink) Old 12-07-02, 04:31 AM Thread Starter
Veteran Ford Member
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Searching for a new home
Posts: 3,657
roll How to be a top Nascar Driver

A few simple rules and guidelines:

1. Your name must end in EEE. As in BobEEE, CasEE, RickEEE, TonEE, KerEEE etc. etc.. Other good old boy names won't do as the commentators are more comfortable with the EEE names.

2. You must be able to follow complex instructions such as "TURN LEFT".

3. The ability to drive whilst three different people are yacking in your ears is handy. The crew chief yelling "Pit, pit", the commentators asking silly questions and the spotter yelling "turn left, turn left".

4. You must have a hard head. This helps you to be convinced that hitting concrete walls at 180mph is actually "good fun".

5. In the post crash interview you must be able to fit all 24 sponsors names into one sentence that includes the phrases "we had a great chance of winning tonight" (even if you qualified 43rd) AND "this is the best car I have ever driven".

6. In the winners circle it is important to remember that the "good Lord" actually helped you to win.

7. It is important to take your helmet with you after exiting a crashed car - this allows you to throw it at the guy who turned you into the wall as he goes past - much to the pleasure of the crowd.

8. You must have perfected the phrase "yeeehaaaaaaawwww".

russellw is offline  
Sponsored Links
post #2 of 2 (permalink) Old 12-07-02, 02:52 PM
We Love Greb Murpy
ford.boy's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: God's Country (Penrith)
Age: 30
Posts: 3,022
Happy that none of the above applies to V8 supercar drivers....

"When I joined the marines all they gave us was two sticks and a rock! And we had to share the rock between the whole platoon!"
H2 pwnz j00 foo.
ford.boy is offline  
Sponsored Links

  Ford Forums - Mustang Forum, Ford Trucks, Ford Focus and Ford Cars > Fordforums Community > The Pub

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Who uses indicators when exiting a roundabout?? MADXF The Pub 68 05-03-04 05:40 PM
When it comes to NASCAR success, think Ford first Stacy94PGT Ford Racing Across the Globe 1 06-13-03 07:21 AM
Mazda Hosts World’s Largest Performance Driving School RPO83 Mazda Forum 1 04-22-03 01:46 AM
Driver Licensing - (DRIVE article extract) russellw The Pub 8 04-09-02 09:46 AM
Codemasters - V8 Supercar Race Driver Luke Plaizier The Pub 24 08-02-01 03:08 AM

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome