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Old 10-07-2003, 08:35   #1 (permalink)
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Read Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

The following is an question given on a University of Washington
chemistry mid-term exam. The answer by one student was so profound that the
professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course,
why we now have the pleasure(?) of enjoying it as well.


Bonus Question: "Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?"

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law, (gas
cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some
variant, but fell short in producing a demonstration argument.

One student however wrote the following:

"First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need
to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are
leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it
will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different
religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that
if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there
are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more
than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and
death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to
increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in
Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and
pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,
then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

Considering then the postulate presented to me by Teresa K. during my
Freshman year that "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you"
and taking into account the fact that over two years later, I still have not
succeeded in having relations with her; then, #2 cannot be true, and thus I
am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze."


The student received the only "A" given.
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Old 10-07-2003, 15:53   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

HAHA, niiiice, I like it.
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Old 10-07-2003, 16:00   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

I have seen that before, very clever work.
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Old 07-26-2004, 05:43   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

I like that equasion. thanks for telling us. john.
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Old 07-26-2004, 06:04   #5 (permalink)
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Re: Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

hehe i like that one.
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Old 07-26-2004, 08:38   #6 (permalink)
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Re: Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

smararse!

mad answer..... in my woodwork exam in year 11... there was a question "when would you adjust a frog".... my answer... when it turns green, jumps around the room, and croaks...... lol... yeh i upt that in the exam lol
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Old 07-26-2004, 16:56   #7 (permalink)
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Re: Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

haha that makes perfect sense. Heard i before though
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Old 07-26-2004, 17:05   #8 (permalink)
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Re: Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

LOL i like it, have heard quite a few of these university exam question jokes, they are great
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Old 07-26-2004, 17:16   #9 (permalink)
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Re: Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

In my marketing exam last semester, there was a question about some sort of complicated marketing crap, so I wrote a story. It was about a giant mushroom that could talk and walk. He went to the markets one day and everybody laughed at him for being so big. So he went into outerspace with a giant laser so he could blow up the town where he lived. Luckily for the the town where he lived, space aliens were monitering the mushrooms actions and before he could unleash his laser of fury, the aliens shot him and the mushroom dies.

The End

Needless to say, I failed.
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Old 07-26-2004, 17:21   #10 (permalink)
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Re: Joke for the chemistry-minded type people

ROFL if i was a lecturer i wouldnt have failed that, haha, reminds me of the story lachlan told us about last year at QUT in brissy some guys final exam was to write an essay on courage and the guy say there for the entire allocated time slot and then handed in one piece of paper and the whole essay was comprised of three words, "This is courage". Apparently he got highest possible marks, makes sense though really.
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