Blue Blooded Ford Man
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Riverina, NSW. Falcon country
Lame Joke Thursday!
Its Thursday and these jokes are Lame!!!
There are two guys who have been lost in the desert for weeks, and they're at death's door. As they stumble on, hoping for salvation in the form of an
oasis or something similar, they suddenly spy, through the heat haze, a tree off in the distance.
As they get closer, they can see that the tree is draped with rasher upon rasher of bacon.
There's smoked bacon, crispy bacon, life-giving juicy nearly- raw bacon, all sorts.
"Oh my, Pepe" says the first bloke. "It's a bacon tree!!! We're saved!!!" "You're right!" says Pepe.
So Pepe goes on ahead and runs up to the tree salivating at the prospect of food. But as he gets to within five feet of the tree, there's the sound of machine gun fire, and he is shot down in a hail of bullets.
His friend quickly drops down on the sand, and calls across to the dying Pepe.
"Pepe!! Pepe!! What on earth happened?"
With his dying breath Pepe calls out
"Ugh, run, run!! It's not a Bacon Tree...
It's a Ham Bush ............
The Williams sisters were recently discussing the subject of drugs in tennis in the warm-up room before a doubles match.
"I think Dad might be slipping us steroids" whispered Serena.
"What makes you say that?" replied a stunned Venus.
"Well", started Serena embarrassingly; "I've started to grow hair on parts of my body that have never had hair before!".
"Sh!t....like where?" asked Venus.
"Like all over my balls!" replied Serena.
Two tourists were traveling through Louisiana. As they approached Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the blonde employee, ''Before we order could you settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are very slowly.'' The blonde leaned over and said ''Burrrrrrr Gurrrrrr Kingggg.''
A cricketer walks in to a doctor's office and says, "Doctor, Doctor I have a cricket ball stuck up my ass! "
The Doctor says, "Howz that??? "
The cricketer replies " oh don't you start!!! "
How do you get a Pikachew on a plane....
Vagina walks into a bar and says to barman.....
Just give me the strongest Liquor you got!
SOME NEW TOWNS IN IRAQ......
US Central Intelligence has discovered SOME NEW TOWNS...
Who won the IRAQI beauty contest?
How do you say Virgin in German?
How do you say Virgin in Chinese
How do you say prostitute in Russian
Marcos Ambrose - 2003 V8 Supercar CHAMPION
This could be the start of something big