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Old 06-28-2001, 22:34   #1 (permalink)
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eek Laminge gets attacked by Ford Security

Well

had a bugger of a day yesterday but the following just made it, but should have I expected any more from FORD!!!!

I decieded yesterday that I would retreive my gearbox from the the Ford Warranty people out at Blue oval land and accordingly rang the contact and arranged for pick up!

I was given directions and off i went, still upset that the buggers denied my claim!!!

I arrived at the location and thus before me was a sentry of gates,trucks,stop signs, fork lifts. do not enters and strip searches!!!

I made my way to one of the security post...

Laminge
"Gday Buddy, I'm lost can you point me in the right direction to get in contact with so and so"
Guard"
You goot park outhere (pointing to where I had come) go in and hang a u turn and park there..
laminge
"Tah"

Thus i drove into Fort Ford, hung U turn and drove out, dodging the gate so that the truck behind me was not held up!!!

Low and behold, a 50 year Chubb FEMALE security guard comes storming up....

Guard
"YOU WILL OBSERVE SPEED LIMITS< YOU WILL STOP > "
Laminge
"Gulp"
Guard
"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING SPEEDING THROUGH THE GATES WITHOUT STOPPING"
Laminge
'Gulp"
Guard
"THERE ARE STOP SIGNS THERE"
Laminge
"the guy told me to do a U turn and park here"
Guard
" WELL HE DIDNT TELL YOU TO SPEED DID HE"
Laminge
" Speak to the hand (holding up my hand in her face and starting to arch the back"

Mind you the who u turn to park was approx 50 metre and I reached a top speed of 10ks

At this stage I was seeing red, and was ready to put 23 stone into a full body slam into this premenstral guard, but i calmed down and requested her to ring my contact so I can get the hell out of the place.

Mind when i left, I put all 330kws to the floor just to show what speed is!

Uncle Geoff.

Your customer service centre sucks.....

If this is the Face of Ford, and to me it is, you have to clean up your act!!!!
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Old 06-28-2001, 22:57   #2 (permalink)
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That really sucks dude, cant say I have ever had that sort of trouble with guards before.
Some of them just take their job way too seriously. I have seen this a fair few times but have not been on the receiving end.

Did you catch the looks of their faces when you tramped it, I love seeing guards get all riled (sp?) up when they cant get to you looking like angry gorillas, jumping around and flailing arms, what a hoot. :) hehe

What did it take to get your beast up to 330kWs?
(eg. mods and money)

Paul.
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Old 06-28-2001, 23:03   #3 (permalink)
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Money wise ummm well over what I should have spent

part wise

Cam
Headers
Intake
Injectors
Blower
Chip
Fuel pumps
Extractors

thats not to so also

rims
gearbox
clutch x3 (hehehe)
brakes
rotors
retrim
tyres x3 (just gone to the bridgestone)

:D
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Old 06-28-2001, 23:08   #4 (permalink)
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SIIICCCKKK MATE!!!

Thats the stuff I like to hear.
How many HSV kills have you got under your belt, I would love to see their faces too. Lining up beside you they would think its only standard 200 or 220kW and then to have the 330 unleashed on them, god that must feel good.
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Old 06-28-2001, 23:11   #5 (permalink)
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I must admit

Only a handfull, until I get my gearbox and clutch sorted out!:rolleyes:
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Old 06-28-2001, 23:18   #6 (permalink)
 
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I shouldn't laugh but I can just picture everything you just said.
Bring on the dodge hey:D
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Old 06-29-2001, 03:36   #7 (permalink)
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ROTFLMAO oh gaz, my ribs are killing me, I've got tears in my eyes. I nearly chocked on my chips when I read that. thats just as good as that other thread we deleted, herculiner on your hootus.
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Old 06-29-2001, 04:07   #8 (permalink)
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Laminge,

Yeah thats abit dodgy mate, good to see you kept your cool though, don't want Laminge to be with the cops. :p :p
but seriously it might not be fords fault, the security guard is from chubb after all.

LOL must had made you day lighting em up and gettin outta the place.
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Old 06-29-2001, 05:39   #9 (permalink)
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Whoahhhhhh!! Nothing like a Gestapo-Wannabe security guard to liven up the day eh mate!! Yeah I've had my share of unintended run-ins with these head cases. They are everywhere. In fact, I've had a very similiar situation to yours mate, where I had my head blown off verbally for taking the directions of another guard.
*The tale begins*
I arrive at the said location, front gate with single guard. I tell guard I'm going to see XXX, as you do, he opens gate and lets me in. I walk across courtyard, into foyer, and start down corridor. Two steps into corridor, the subtle hum of the air conditioner is smashed by some bloke behind me screaming "HEY!! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU GOING AND WHO ARE YOU!!". After trying to calmly explain who I was and what I was doing, (with continued frenzied interruptions), he didn't believe me and gave me a serve. He *almost* threatened me, which would have been a huge mistake on his behalf, legally speaking. Anyhow, I somehow kept myself together, asked this second idiot to contact the first one who gave me the directions, and after this I got the second to contact the guy I was going to see (a senior and powerful member of the company). He came to the foyer as they STILL wouldn't let me through, and only then did I decide to let the volcano erupt... hehehe... aaah how very satisfying that was! He said to me as I was on my way out after the meeting that he would have "strong words and possible actions taken" with this psycho guard. On my next visit, he informed me that that particular guard had done this several other times, and after my incident, he had been given the shaft, very hard and very dry. A fair and just ending to my tale! :D :D :D

Hope that little tale brightens things up a bit Gaz!
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Old 06-29-2001, 06:16   #10 (permalink)
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The problem isn't FORD security per se, it's security in general. It seems anyone can get a security license, get a job for a half-arsed security company and suddently attempt exhibit qualities of their favourite action movie star.

Whether Ford's own security which gave Gaz grief was in house or contracted, they are probably beyond Uncle Geoff's control.

Security will be boofheads no matter where you go, whether they be Ford security, pub bouncers, gig security, or whatever.
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