* You may never leave your car keys in an unattended vehicle.
* It is illegal to roam the streets wearing black clothes, felt shoes and
black shoe polish on your face as these items are the tools of a cat
* It is illegal to walk on the right hand side of a footpath.
* Under Australian Communications Authority (ACA) regulations, a modem can't
pick up on the first ring. If it does the, ACA permit for your modem is
invalid and there's a $12,000 fine. -Telecommunications Act 1991.
* Taxi cabs are required to carry a bale of hay in the trunk.
* Bars are required to stable, water and feed the horses of their patrons.
* Only licensed electricians may change a light bulb. The fine for not
abiding by this law is 10 pounds.
* It is illegal to wear hot pink pants after midday Sunday.
* You must have a neck to knee swimsuit in order to swim at Brighton Beach.
* You may not fish on Sundays.
* It is illegal to be a drunk in possession of a cow.
* Trespassing on someone else's land is legal.
* You are presumed guilty until proven innocent.
* If someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your commode, you
must let them enter.
* Bicycles may not ridden without a license. (Repealed)
* Picking your nose on Saturday is forbidden.
* It is forbidden to bring bears to the beach.
* No loud voices or big lights are allowed during weekends.
* With the exception of carrots, most goods may not be sold on Sunday.
* All English males over the age 14 are to carry out 2 or so hours of
longbow practice a week supervised by the local clergy.
* London Hackney Carriages (taxis/cabs) must carry a bale of hay and a sack
* It is illegal to be drunk on Licensed Premises (in a pub or bar).
* A Chelsea Pensioner may not be impersonated.
* It is illegal for a lady to eat chocolates on a public conveyance.
* Mince pies are not to be eaten on Christmas Day.
* Any boy under the age of 10 may not see a naked manequin.
* You may not make out in public.
* It is legal for a male to urinate in public, as long it is on the rear
wheel of his motor vehicle and his right hand is on the vehicle.
* Committing suicide is classified as a capital crime and is punishable by
* You can only shoot a Welsh person with a bow and arrow inside the city
walls and after midnight.
* You may not shoot a Welsh person on Sunday with a longbow in the Cathedral
* It is illegal for a woman to be topless in public except as a clerk in a
tropical fish store.
* Excluding Sundays, it is perfectly legal to shoot a Scotsman with a bow
* Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon
* A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she
shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.
* If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be
paid just as it would for a vehicle..
* It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.
* Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
* Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.
* It is illegal to skateboard without a license.
* When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.
* You may not fart in a public place after 6 P.M. on Thursdays.
* It is considered an offense to shower naked.
* You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the
edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.
* Oral sex is illegal. - why?
* You may not kiss your wife's breasts.
Big Pine Key
* It is illegal to molest a Key deer. If caught one will be fined or will
have to go to jail.
* It is against the city ordinance to hang your clothes outside on a
* The molestation of trash cans is banned.
* Chickens are considered a 'protected species'.
* It is illegal for men to be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
* Citizens may not be caught downtown without at least 10 dollars on their
* It is illegal to roll a barrel on any street, fines go up according to the
contents of the barrel.
* A women can be fined, for being electrocuted in a bath-tub because of
using self-beautification utensils.
* If you hit a pedestrian you are fined $78.00
* You may not catch crabs.
* It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.