Monaro: Lame Over
Okay, I admit we didn't hit a freeway and do big speed overtaking moves, we were only on 60kmph streets, but boy I was left wondering what the fuss was about after 2 rides in a new Monaro the other afternoon.
The guy traded in his VS Calais for it and has a towball to tow a trailerboat. "Come with me and I can show off my new car," says he. "What is it?" says I. "No questions till we get there," he says as we get in. Its low and on real low profile slot car tyres. He's already had a front one go flat and dag the lower part of the passneger side spoiler. (Its still just black plastic under the fancy silver paint). Inside it had a flashy red speedo and tach and a mirror which is an emergency phone. Seats were the usual vinyl stuff and all black. And low in the car. No thanks thinks me. Well its an auto and the engine is.... I spent the next 10 mins trying to pick up from noises whether it was a 6 or an 8. Waste of time: no audio clues even without the radio gizmo switiched on. I didn't want to look stupid and ask him what engine it was. I looked for a badge. Nuh. Hmmm.
Again, on the way back, I asked a few questions aimed at giving him the opportunity to fill in the blanks for me: "I used to have a VN 5.0L chaser and it growled a bit and the turbo 400 auto was great. But my petrol card used to rack up $450 a month..." I said.
Still quiet. Tried again with another question like the first and I finally got the answer, half-way back to the carpark. "This 5.7 is heaps better than my old 5.0L..." he finally starts saying. Yeah, right.
Um. It had no V8 sound. It accelerated real good etc, but I may as well have been riding in the monorail at Circular Quay. And the size of the monthly bill to AGC!!!
I reckon the money it depreciates every month equals the amount he pays over as an installment! How do they sell these things? Where's the payoff?
For my money, my brother in law's old Z? 351 Fairlane had more excitement. Muscle cars must have rumbles and character.
Monaro - Lame Over.
<div align="center"><table width="470" cellspacing="6" cellpadding="1" border="0"><tr><td align="center" valign="top" bgcolor="#C0D9D9"><font color="#2500A2" size="-2" face="verdana, arial, geneva">Can't get to sleep? Try reading about</font><BR><a href="http://remlr.150m.com/wagon/" target="www"><img src="http://remlr.150m.com/wagon/snafu.gif" width="260" height="40" border=0 vspace=0 hspace=0 alt="Click for the story of Snafu's 1993 EB2 Falcon Wagon"></a><BR><font color="#656565" size="-1" face="verdana, arial, geneva">...<I>more problems = more fixes = more reliable</I>...</font></td></tr></table></div>