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post #1 of 2 (permalink) Old 05-12-02, 07:38 PM Thread Starter
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Political Correctness

OW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT

1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED CITIZEN

2. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE

3. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY

4. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is A PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION

5. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.

6. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.

7. She is not HORNY - She is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.

8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.

9. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.

10. She is not a **** - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.

11. She does not have PREMIER LEAGUE HOOTERS -She is PECTORALLY
SUPERIOR.

12. She is not a TWO-BIT SLAPPER - She is a LOW COST SERVICE PROVIDER.


HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE
FACILITY.

2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.

3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE
DESTINATIONS.

4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.

5. He is not a CRADLE SNATCHER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL
RELATIONSHIPS.

6. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY
HORIZONTAL.

7. He does not act like a TOTAL ARSE - He develops a case of
RECTAL-CRANIAL
INVERSION.

8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.

9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED

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post #2 of 2 (permalink) Old 05-12-02, 08:54 PM
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Some good ones there!

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine.'So that was nice.

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