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Old 08-26-2004, 05:31   #1 (permalink)
E Series Chick Supremo
 
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Real women -vs- Ladies

Ladies - Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

Real Women - Leftover wine?? Hello!!


************************************************************

Ladies - Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

Real Women - Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who the hell cares!


*************************************************************
Ladies - Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.

Real Women - Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake. You are probably lying on your ass on the couch, with your feet up anyway.


*************************************************************
Ladies - To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

Real Women - Buy boxed mashed potato mix and you don't have to worry about the potatoes growing arms and legs.


*************************************************************
Ladies - When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white powdery mess on the bottom of the cake.

Real Women - Go to the bakery - they'll even decorate the son of a bitch for you.


*************************************************************
Ladies - Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

Real Women - Sara Lee frozen freakin pie directions do not include brushing egg whites, so don't do it.


*************************************************************
Ladies - If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

Real Women - Go ask the very HOT neighbour guy to do it.


*************************************************************
And finally the most important tip....

*************************************************************

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail....... but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn... that was fun!!



:fairy
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Old 08-26-2004, 05:34   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Real women -vs- Ladies

LOL, some good ones in there!
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Old 08-26-2004, 07:13   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Real women -vs- Ladies

lmao, good stuff ma
love that last quote :), an oldie but a damn goodie :)
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Old 08-26-2004, 07:24   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Real women -vs- Ladies

So which one are you MN?
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Old 08-26-2004, 07:36   #5 (permalink)
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Re: Real women -vs- Ladies

Hahahahahahaha you tell me



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Old 08-26-2004, 08:24   #6 (permalink)
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Re: Real women -vs- Ladies

MN, I got this from a female friend.
She also happens to have completed nearly all 20 items!!
(Not all on the one night though.)


20 signs when a woman should call it a night.........

1. You have absolutely no idea where your bag is.

2. You truly believe that dancing with your arms overhead and
wiggling your bottom while yelling WOO-HOO is truly the sexiest dance
move around.

3. You've suddenly decided that you want to kick someone's ass and
honestly believe that you could do it too.

4. In your last trip to "pee" you realise you now look more like Lily
Savage than the goddess you were just four hours ago.

5. You drop your 3:00 a.m. kebab on the floor (which you're eating
even though you're not the least bit hungry), pick it up and carry on
eating it.

6. You start crying and telling everyone you see that you love them
sooooo much.

7. There are less than three hours before you're due to start work.

8. You've found a deeper/spiritual side to the geek sitting next to you.

9. The man you're flirting with used to be your biology teacher.

10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and
sing or dance becomes strangely overwhelming.

11. Your eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so
you decide to keep them half closed and think it looks exotically
sexy.

12. You seem to think that it's a really good idea to get your mates
to push you down the street in a shopping trolley.

13. You yell at the bartender, who (you think) cheated you by giving
you just lemonade, but that's just because you can no longer taste
the vodka.

14. You think you're in bed, but the pillow feels strangely like the
kitchen floor.

15. You start every conversation with a booming, "DON'T take this the
WRONG WAY but..."

16. You fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when you sit on it.

17. You're hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves.

18. You're soooo tired you just sit on the floor (wherever you happen
to be standing) and take a quick nap.

19. You begin leaving the buttons open on your button fly pants to
cut down on the time you're in the bathroom away from your drink.

20. You take your shoes off because you really believe it's their
fault that you're having problems walking straight..

Some good ones there!

Ed :)
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Old 08-26-2004, 08:29   #7 (permalink)
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Re: Real women -vs- Ladies

Good grief, that sounds like a typical 21st party on most weekends in Werribee!!!
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Old 08-27-2004, 02:04   #8 (permalink)
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Re: Real women -vs- Ladies

hahahahahahahahaha .... must admit all of the above have been achieved in a short period of time ............. well not in 1 night .... but we do have all weekenders up here occasionally

/me wonders if that gives the answer to physco chicken ........


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Old 08-27-2004, 04:25   #9 (permalink)
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Re: Real women -vs- Ladies

Priceless!!!!!!!!

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Old 08-27-2004, 05:47   #10 (permalink)
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Re: Real women -vs- Ladies

haha nice MA
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