Shane and Gary fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money between them(could be that Gary spent too much on his car - as usual
), they could only raise the staggering sum of 50 pence.
Gary said, "Hang on, I have an idea."
He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage.
Shane said, "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all."
Gary replied, "Don't worry - just follow me."
He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses of Macallan Scotch whiskey.
Shane said, "Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money!!"
Gary replied with a smile, "Don't worry, I have a plan. Cheers!"
They downed their drinks.
Gary said, "OK, I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth."
The barman noticed them, went berserk and threw them out.
They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk all for free.
At the twentieth pub, Shane said, "Gary, I don't think I can do any more o'this. Me knees are killin' me!"
Gary said, "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub."