Just give me an excuse...
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: struct melbourne hallam;
She drinks/He drinks - personality test
IF WOMEN DRINK:
Drink : Beer.
Personality : Casual, low maintenance; down to earth.
Approach : Challenge her to a game of pool.
Drink : Blender drinks with umbrella.
Personality: Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a pain in the arse.
Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabin boy.
Drink : Mixed drinks - no umbrellas
Personality: Mature, has picky taste; knows what she wants. Approach : If she wants you, she’ll send YOU a drink.
Drink : Wine - (bottled not 4 litre cask)
Personality: Conservative and classy, sophisticated.
Approach: Try and weave Paris and clothing into the conversation.
Drink : Bacardi Breezer, Smirnoff ice, Vodka mule, etc Personality : Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated actually has absolutely no clue. Approach : Make her feel smarter than she is... and you’re in.
Personality: Annoying voice, bit of a tart.
Approach: Stand close and mention the alley next to the pub.
Drink : Shots (Vodka, Aftershock etc.).
Personality : Hanging with male pals or looking to get drunk... and naked. Approach : Easiest hit in the pub. Nothing to do but wait.
IF MEN DRINK -As always, very simple and clear cut.
Cider : He’s probably under-aged and wants to get laid.
Cheap Domestic Beer : He’s poor / student and wants to get laid.
Premium Local Beer : He likes good beer and wants to get laid.
Bitter : He’s old, he likes good beer and wants to get laid.
Imported Beer : He likes expensive beer and wants to get laid
Guinness : The man is a rapist and will get laid one way or another.
Wine: He’s hoping that the wine thing will give him a sophisticated image and help him get laid.
Vodka or Brandy : Extremely horny hound, would shag a warm scarf. Desperate to get laid.
Port : Thinks he’s sophisticated, secretly likes men and wants to get laid.
Whisky : He doesn’t give two shits about anything and will hit anyone who will get in his way of getting laid.
Jack Daniels : Not as masculine as the whisky drinker, knows all about feminine activities (knitting, crochet etc.) to weasel himself into getting laid.
Tequila : Likes fighting almost as much as getting laid.
Bacardi Breezer, Smirnoff ice, Vodka mule, etc: He’s GAY
Truly the deepest kiss one can feel, and the one most sought after, is the one you will not survive....