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post #1 of 1 (permalink) Old 12-11-03, 07:37 AM Thread Starter
Now driving an XF Falcon.
The MaDDeSTMaN's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Western Suburbs of Melbourne..
Age: 37
Posts: 1,042
biggrin Some pets are smarter then you might think...

As seen in a dog's diary:

8am - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
9am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite
10am - Oh Boy! A walk! My favorite!
11am - Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!
Noon - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
1pm - Oh Boy! The yard! My favorite!
3pm - Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!
4pm - Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!
5pm - Oh Boy! Mom! My favorite!
7pm - Oh Boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
9pm - Oh Boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!
As seen in a cat's diary:

Day 183 of my captivity...
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded -- must try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I
once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair -- must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...
This is why I'm not a cat person, LOL!

1985 Ford XF Falcon GL.
4.1L carby Inline 6 cylinder crossflow engine, 3 speed auto, ZL Fairlane instrument cluster and seats, EA Fairmont 15" alloy wheels...
Coming soon: Extractors and decent exhaust...

Last edited by The MaDDeSTMaN; 12-11-03 at 07:45 AM. Reason: I'm not a cat person...
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