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post #1 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-16-03, 03:12 AM Thread Starter
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Sporting Quotes

Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Darryl Gibson comes inside of him. (NZ Rugby commentator)

This is really a lovely horse. I once rode her mother. (Ted Walsh, horse racing commentator)

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it, which is identical. (Murray Walker, F1 racing commentator)

Sure, there have been deaths in racing, but none of them serious. (Alan Minter)

The batsman's Holding, the bowler's Willey. (Brian Johnstone, cricket commentator)

If history repeats itself, I think we can expect the same thing again. (Terry Venables)

I would not say that David Ginola is the best left winger in the
Premiership, but there are none better. (Ron Atkinson)

Ah isn't that nice. The wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew. (Harry Carpenter)

Morcelli has the four fastest 1500m times ever. And all those times over 1500m. (David Coleman)

Julian Dicks is every where. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the
field. (Metro Radio)

Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seems to hang in the air even longer. (David Acfield)

What will you do when you leave football, Jack? Will you stay in
football? (Stuart Hall, Radio 5 Live)

And there goes Juantorena down the back straight, opening his legs and showing his class.(David Coleman, Montreal Olympics)

And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing. (Pat Glen, weightlifting commentator)

I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. (Winston Bennet)

I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father. (Greg

One of the reasons Arnie (Arnold Palmer) is playing so well is that,
before each tee shot, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them. (US golf commentator).

Truly the deepest kiss one can feel, and the one most sought after, is the one you will not survive....
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post #2 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-16-03, 03:51 AM
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Re: Sporting Quotes

Cant stop laughing.

I needed that after the day i've had.
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post #3 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-16-03, 07:19 AM
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Re: Sporting Quotes

HHAHAHA thats hilarious!

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post #4 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-16-03, 05:09 PM
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Re: Sporting Quotes

They are classic! Murray Walker is a particularly funny guy...there are heaps of his floating around.

Would you like to change your name to Homer Junior? People can call you Hoju.
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post #5 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-16-03, 09:30 PM
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Re: Sporting Quotes

Some more Murray Walker Quotes:

"Do my eyes deceive me, or is Senna's Lotus sounding rough ?"

"Alboreto has dropped back up to fifth place"

"I can't imagine what kind of problem Senna has. I imagine it must be some sort of grip problem"

"He is shedding buckets of adrenalin in that car"

"So Bernie [Ecclestone], in the seventeen years since you bought McLaren, which of your many achievements do you think was the most memorable ?" Bernie Answers, "Well I don't remember buying McLaren." [Bernie Ecclestone used to own the Brabham team].

Murray: "What's that? There's a BODY on the track!!!"
James: "Um, I think that that is a piece of BODY-WORK, from someone's car."

"I don't want to tempt fate but Damon Hill is now only half a lap from his first Grand Prix win and..and HE'S SLOWING DOWN, DAMON HILL IS SLOWING DOWN..HE'S..HE'S STOPPED."

"1.4 seconds may not seem like much but in Formula One, 1.4 seconds is light years"

"...Cruel luck for Alesi, second on the grid. That's the first time he had started from the front row in a Grand Prix, having done so in Canada earlier this year..."

"And there's the man in the green flag!"

Murray: And look at the flames coming from the back of Berger's McLaren
James: Actually, Murray, they're not flames, it's the safety light.

"...and there's no damage to the car.....except to the car itself."

'and I interrupt myself to bring you this....'

"This is an interesting circuit because it has inclines, and not just up, but down as well."

"Only a few more laps to go and then the action will begin, unless this is the action, which it is."

"Tambay's hopes , which were nil before, are absolutely zero now."

"You can't see a digital clock because there isn't one."

"The Italian GP at Monaco..."

...the enthusiastic enthusiasts... (Italy 1994)

`Ukyo Katayama is undoubtedly the best formula 1 driver that grand prix racing has ever produced'

"As you can see, visually, with your eyes..."

"Andrea de Cesaris...the man who has won more Grands Prix than anyone else without actually winning one of them."

And we have had 5 races so far this year, Brazil, Argentina, Imola, Schumacher and Monaco!

And Damon Hill is coming into the pit lane, yes it's Damon Hill coming into the Williams pit, and Damon Hill in the pit, no it's Michael Schumacher!

"Mansell is slowing it down, taking it easy. Oh no he isn't! It's a lap record."

"Into lap 53, the penultimate last lap but one"

"There are a lot of IFs in Formula One, in fact IF is Formula One backwards!"

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post #6 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-16-03, 10:25 PM
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Re: Sporting Quotes

murray walker is hysterical - possibly the best example of someone with no connection between brain and mouth . . .
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post #7 of 7 (permalink) Old 10-16-03, 11:34 PM
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Re: Sporting Quotes

A while ago I got an email with some more of these sorts of quotes.

During the England World Cup game goalkeeper, David Seaman was having a great game and dominating the penalty area, prompting commentator Martin Tyler to say: "Seaman is all over the box!"

Sandy Roberts was hosting some an event on Channel 7 when he introduced the incumbent Miss Australia, Cynthia Dick as Cynthia Cock! Amid raucous laughter from the live audience & despite barely being able to contain his own laughter, good old Sandy desperately sought to recover the situation by exclaiming "you must get Cock quite a lot'!

Ken Brown commentating on golfer Nick Faldo and his caddie Fanny Sunneson lining-up shots at the Scottish Open: "Some weeks Nick likes to use Fanny, other weeks he prefers to do it by himself."

Mike Hallett discussing missed snooker shots on Sky Sports: "Stephen Hendry jumps on Steve Davis's misses every chance he gets."

Jack Burnicle was talking about Colin Edwards' tyres on World Super bikes: "Colin had a hard on in practice earlier, and I bet he wished he had a hard on now."

Winning Post's Stewart Machin commentating on jockey Tony McCoy's formidable lead: "Tony has a quick look between his legs and likes what he sees."

Ross King discussing relays with champion runner Phil Redmond: "Well Phil, tell us about your amazing third leg."

Cricketer Neil Fairbrother hit a single during a Durham v Lancashire match, inspiring Bobby Simpson to observe: "With his lovely soft hands he just tossed it off."

James Allen interviewing Ralf Schumacher at a Grand Prix, asked: "What does it feel like being rammed up the backside by Barrichello?"

Steve Ryder covering the US Masters: "Ballesteros felt much better today after a 69."

The new stand at Doncaster racecourse took Brough Scott's breath away. "My word," he said. "Look at that magnificent erection."


Also, got to love Murray's commentary. Never a dull race with Murray commentating!

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