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Old 12-29-2004, 13:11   #1 (permalink)
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Still More jokes

> >A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his
> >patients (predominately male) while he was performing their
> >colonoscopies:
> >
> >1. "Take it easy Doc, you're boldly going where no man has gone before!"
> >2. "Find Harold Holt yet?"
> >3. :Can you hear me NOW?"
> >4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"
> >5. "You know in Tasmania we're now legally married."
> >6. "Any sign of the trapped miners Chief?"
> >7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."
> >8. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"
> >9. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!"
> >10. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."
> >11. "You used to be an executive at James Hardie, didn't you?"
> >12. "God, Now I know why I am not gay." And the best one of them all...
> >
> >13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is in fact
> >not up there.

The old Rabbi
> >
> >In Jerusalem, an American female journalist heard about an old rabbi
> >who visited the Wailing Wall to pray, twice a day, everyday, for a
> >long, long time.
> >
> >
> >In an effort to check out the story, she goes to the holy site and
> >sure enough, there he is!
> >
> >She watches the bearded old man at prayer, and after about 45 minutes,
> >as he turns to leave, she approaches him for an interview. "I'm Rebecca
> >Smith from CNN, sir. How long have you been coming to the Wailing Wall
> >and praying?"
> >
> >
> >"For about 50 years," he informs her.
> >
> >
> >"50 years! That's amazing, sir!!
> >
> >
> >Can I ask you, what do you pray for?"
> >
> >
> >"I pray for peace between the Jews and the Arabs. I pray for all the
> >hatred to stop, and I pray for all our children to grow up in safety and
> >friendship."
> >
> >
> >"And how do you feel, sir, after doing this for 50 years?"
> >
> >
> >The old man replied, "Like I'm talking to a f**king brick wall"
Every day above ground is a good day
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Old 12-29-2004, 13:21   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Still More jokes

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Old 12-29-2004, 14:26   #3 (permalink)
in the chopshop workshop
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Re: Still More jokes

lol its funny cause its true
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