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Old 02-06-2002, 16:04   #1 (permalink)
 
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Things Men Need To Know About Style

Things Men Need To Know About Style

1. Yes, Homer Simpson is funny - but not on your tie.
2. Only consider tucking your jumper into your jeans if you're a priest.
3. Getting your girlfriend to iron your jeans is unacceptable. Ironing them
yourself is evidence of an unsound mind.
4. Cowboy boots - NO!!!
5. Pointy lace-up shoes with white socks make women retch.
6. Going bald ? - shave it off for God's sake.
7. Never take your top off in public, unless you've just won Wimbledon.
8. Donald Duck socks do not reflect your individuality nor the wild side of
your of corporate facade. They do, however, mean your mother still dresses
you or you wish she did.
9. Socks and sandals are gross, even on Germans.
10. A jester hat does not a wacky man make. Even Noddy Holder regrets the
70s.
11. Speedos are only acceptable on Olympic swimmers......
12. as are medallions.....
13. ...and tracksuit tops and bottoms.
14. Do you have a grey, red and black asymmetrical flanette shirt and Ugg
boots?? Ring Mullett helpline 0845 601 0740
15. Open shirts: one button open = cool; two buttons = casual; three =
oversharing.
16. Tight sleeveless muscle t-shirts are only ok if you're 17, can do the
running-on-the-spot dance and are a member of NSYNC.
17. Fold-up scooter + middle thirties executive = wanker.
18. Here's a startling fact guys: Lara Croft isn't real. And Angelina Joeli
is an actress and married.
19. Is your definition of "new season shopping" buying the new Broncos' kit?
Please seek professional help.
20. Unless you own a rap empire, leave the chunky gold bracelet and "ice"
ring in the window of Wallace Bishop's where it can live a long and happy
life doing no-one any harm....
21. You'll NEVER pull a chick if you put things including your mobile phone
in the side pocket of your cargo pants.
22. Bleached blonde hair. If it didn't work for Billy Idol, it's not going
to do it for you.
23. Chinos - fashionable for 6 months in 1989 and that was it.

Things Women need To Know About Style

1. Show more cleavage.
2. Wear shorter skirts.
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Old 02-06-2002, 16:14   #2 (permalink)
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Got this one today, the mirror version to the one Carolyn posted a week or so ago.

Women think they already know everything, but wait.. training courses are now available for women on the following subjects:

1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before
2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits
3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits
4. Man Management: Minor Household Chores Can Wait until After the Game
5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too.
6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His
7. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First
8. Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking
9. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging
10. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire
11. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up
12. Introduction to Parking
13. Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space
14. Water Retention: Fact or Fat
15. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter
16. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption
17. Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People
18. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully
19. PMS: Your Problem . .. . Not His
20. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To
21. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have
22. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice
23. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together
24. Oil and Petrol: Your Car Needs Both
25. TV Remotes: For Men Only
26. Getting ready to go out: Start the day before.

Please register immediately as courses are in great demand.
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Old 02-06-2002, 16:20   #3 (permalink)
 
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hse
i always thought you were a guy???
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Old 02-06-2002, 16:33   #4 (permalink)
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Hehehe good post HSE2, after reading those styling cues, i don't think i do any of those. Well hope not anyway. :oo1: :oo1: :oo1:
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Old 02-06-2002, 16:34   #5 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by adviliax mortus
hse
i always thought you were a guy???
What ever gave you that Idea?
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Old 02-06-2002, 16:43   #6 (permalink)
FM
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Quote:
14. Do you have a grey, red and black asymmetrical flanette shirt and Ugg boots?? Ring Mullett helpline 0845 601 0740
O Shyte!.. :s6:
Quote:
22. Bleached blonde hair. If it didn't work for Billy Idol, it's not going to do it for you.
Now you tell me! Bugger!! :oo1:
Quote:
Things Women need To Know About Style

1. Show more cleavage.
2. Wear shorter skirts.
AGREED!!!! Only for spunks but.. :MUha:
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Old 02-06-2002, 16:58   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by EF_Falcon_GuY
Hehehe good post HSE2, after reading those styling cues, i don't think i do any of those. Well hope not anyway. :oo1: :oo1: :oo1:
Nah... you just gotta learn to walk properly... (stryder / kung fu boy!!)
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Old 02-06-2002, 17:30   #8 (permalink)
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Re: Things Men Need To Know About Style

Quote:
Originally posted by HSE2
1. Yes, Homer Simpson is funny - but not on your tie.
SACRELIGE!!! The Homer tie will NOT be mocked!!!
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Old 02-06-2002, 17:32   #9 (permalink)
 
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Re: Re: Things Men Need To Know About Style

Quote:
Originally posted by Mr Sparkle


SACRELIGE!!! The Homer tie will NOT be mocked!!!
depends on what the tie is covering
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Old 02-06-2002, 17:54   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally posted by XR8chic


Nah... you just gotta learn to walk properly... (stryder / kung fu boy!!)
Buu Buu But i do walk properly.. :oo1: :oo1: :crazy1: :crazy1:
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