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Old 02-07-2002, 04:03   #1 (permalink)
 
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Top Ten Things NOT To Say To The Cop Who Pulls You Over

Top Ten Things NOT To Say To The Cop Who Pulls You Over

Rated PG

10. Your so-called "speed limits" mean nothing to me flatfoot. I live my life one quarter-mile at a time.

9. You again? I thought I lost you at that last red light.

8. Aren't you going to strip search me, big boy?

7. I am not the droid you're looking for. You don't need to see my papers.

6. Darn! My radar detector must be broken again.

5. You better hurry up with that ticket. Dunkin' Donuts closes in 15 minutes.

4. You're not going to search my trunk are you?

3. How about you watch my friend Ben Franklin while I get my registration?

2. Sorry I was speeding officer, but your daughter said she had to be home by eleven.

1. Hey Barney! How are things in Mayberry?
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Old 02-07-2002, 04:07   #2 (permalink)
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You subscribe to Twistedhumor as well don't you HSE2??
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Old 02-07-2002, 04:10   #3 (permalink)
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The best thing you could to a COP who pulls you over after tailing you for several kilometres at high speed.

'My wife ran off with a policeman, and I thought you were trying to give her back!'
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Old 02-07-2002, 04:13   #4 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by Venom XR
The best thing you could to a COP who pulls you over after tailing you for several kilometres at high speed.

'My wife ran off with a policeman, and I thought you were trying to give her back!'
And we have a winner. I should edit the original
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Old 02-07-2002, 13:07   #5 (permalink)
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Very Funny HSE2!:s6: :s6: :s6: :s6: :s6: :s6: :s6:
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Old 02-07-2002, 21:14   #6 (permalink)
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HSE2 have u been watching "Along come a spider":s5:
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Old 02-07-2002, 21:21   #7 (permalink)
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How about:

COP: Why were you speeding?
YOU: Well you see officer, I just washed it and needed to take it for a blow dry.
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Old 02-07-2002, 22:13   #8 (permalink)
 
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Quote:
Originally posted by XBXR6UTEMAN
How about:

COP: Why were you speeding?
YOU: Well you see officer, I just washed it and needed to take it for a blow dry.
Hey that is the line I use:s5
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Old 02-08-2002, 10:32   #9 (permalink)
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"Oh, Officer? You want to see my license and registration? Let me just put down this beer and joint and I'll ask my 14-year-old girlfriend to get it for you."

"The speed limit's in KM/H, not MPH?"
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Old 02-08-2002, 16:31   #10 (permalink)
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Cop pulls you over for speeding, and comes to the window.

Cop - can I see your licence and registration

You - No can do officer

Cop - Why is that?

You - Dont have a licence, it got cancelled.

Cop - pardon? can I see your registration then?

You - Sorry, cant do that?

Cop - excuse me?

You - My registration is in my glove box, but I cant show you.

Cop - why?

You - cos thats where all my un paid parking tickets and my gun is.

Cop - You have a gun in your glove box?

You - Yeah, I put it there after I shot my wife.

Cop - WHAT?

You - yeah, after I put her body into the boot, I put the gun in the glove box, and was on my way to dump her body when you pulled me over.

(Cop goes back to his car, and calls for backup)
10 mins later more cops arrive.

Head cop comes up to the window.

You - would you like to see my licence? (show him your licence)

Head cop - ummm... ok..

You - here is my rego too. (show him your rego)

Head cop - would you mind opening your glove box.

You - no problems (you open glove box and there only thing in there is a discount coupon for midas)

Head cop - would you mind opening your boot?

You - no problems. (you open the boot and its completely empty.

Head cop - I dont understand this... the officer said you had a suspended licence, a glove box full of unpaid tickets, and a gun, and a dead body in the boot.

You - I suppose he also told you I was speeding!!
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