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Humor Heard a good joke or funny story? Keep it PG please.

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Old 10-01-2010, 18:43   #1 (permalink)
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Blonde Jokes:

Q. What do you call a Bunch of Blondes?
A. Frosted Flakes.

One day a big group of blondes met in New York to show the world that blondes aren't dumb.
They begged: "Ask any of us any question, and we will show you that we're not dumb."

The group caught the attention of a passer by, who volunteered to ask them some questions. He climbed up on a car and randomly picked a blonde out of the crowd.
She got up on the car too and the man asked: "What is the first month of the year?"
The blonde responded: "November?"

"Nope," said the man. At this point the crowd began to chant, "Give her another chance, give her another chance."

So the man asked: "What is the capital of the U.S.A ?"
The blonde responded: "Paris?"
So the crowd began chanting again: "Give her another chance, give her another chance."

The man said: "Okay, but this is the last one. What is one plus one?"
The blonde replied: "Two?"

“Give her another chance, Give her another chance." screamed the crowd.



Speeding TicketA blonde was speeding on the highway when a police car pulled her over.

The policeman walks up to the blonde and says "Excuse m'am, could I please see your driving license and registration."

The blonde looks at the policeman angrily and says "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"


Light BulbQ: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: Two, one to hold the light bulb and one to spin the ladder around!

Meeting St. Peter

Three blonde friends died together in a car wreck. They found themselves standing in front of the pearly gates with St. Peter. He told them that before they could enter heaven, they had to tell him what Easter was about.
The first blonde said, "Easter is a big holiday where we give thanks, have a big feast and eat turkey."
"Nooooo," said St. Peter. "You don't get in."
The second blonde said, "Easter is the holiday that we celebrate Jesus' being born of the virgin and give gifts to each other."
"Nooooo," said St. Peter. "You don't get in, either."
The third blonde said, "Well, I know what Easter is all about. Easter is a Christian holiday which coincides with the Jewish Passover. After Jesus celebrated Passover with His disciples, He was betrayed by Judas and turned over to the Romans. They crucified Him on a cross. After He died, they buried him in a tomb and put a huge boulder in front of it."
"Very good!" said St. Peter.
The blonde continued. "Now, every year, the Jews roll the stone away and Jesus comes out. If He sees his shadow, we have 6 more weeks of basketball."
St. Peter fainted!



What Kind of Tracks Are They?

Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks.
The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks."
The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks."
The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks."
The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them.



Blonde Entertainment

How do you keep a blonde busy for hours?
Scroll Down. --->











<----- Scroll Up.

Three Blondes Fishing

Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, "Excuse me, ladies, I'd like to see your fishing licenses."
"We don't have any," replied the first blonde.
"Well, if you're going to fish, you need fishing licenses," said the Game Warden.
"But officer," replied the second blonde, "we aren't fishing. We all have magnets at the end of our lines and we're collecting debris off the bottom of the river."
The Game Warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were horseshoe magnets tied on the end of each line. "Well, I know of no law against it," said the Game Warden. "Take all the debris you want." And with that, he left.
As soon as the Game Warden was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. "What a dumb Fish Cop," the second blonde said to the other two. "Doesn't he know that there are steelhead trout in this river?"
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Old 10-02-2010, 09:29   #2 (permalink)
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Re: Blonde Jokes:

Did you hear of the 2 Blonds walkling down the street and walked into this building? You thought one of them would have noticed.
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Old 10-02-2010, 09:57   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Blonde Jokes:

The blond keyboard cracks me up.

Nabble - Blonde Jokes - Computer Keyboard for Blondes
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Old 10-02-2010, 12:03   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Blonde Jokes:

Quote:
Originally Posted by tdpower View Post
My wife said; Oh I like that...Is that a joke or can you really buy that? hahahahahaha
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Old 10-03-2010, 01:28   #5 (permalink)
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Re: Blonde Jokes:

Quote:
Originally Posted by jwko View Post
My wife said; Oh I like that...Is that a joke or can you really buy that? hahahahahaha
LMAO maybe there is a market for this keyboard haha
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Old 10-03-2010, 09:09   #6 (permalink)
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Re: Blonde Jokes:

lmao, looks that way
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Old 10-03-2010, 14:02   #7 (permalink)
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Re: Blonde Jokes:

A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket.

Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.

She showed him the instructions on the tin,

"For best results, put on two coats".

and

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger.
First Blonde:

"I can't seem to get this door unlocked!
Second Blonde:
Well you better hurry up. It's starting to rain and the top is down!

and

Q: Did you hear the one about the blonde who had a bumper sticker that said, “ALL BLONDES AREN’T DUMB?”
A: No one could read it because it was hung upside-down.
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Old 10-03-2010, 14:12   #8 (permalink)
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Old 10-04-2010, 07:31   #9 (permalink)
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Re: Blonde Jokes:

OMG...That is too funny, My wife almost Peee'd her pants laughing...Thanks Jim!!
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Old 10-04-2010, 07:36   #10 (permalink)
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Re: Blonde Jokes:

A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket.

Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.

She showed him the instructions on the tin,

"For best results, put on two coats".

LMAO!!!
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